Written by Catherine
I’ve always been an independent woman who loves traveling. Traveling alone, especially when traveling abroad, is scary. It requires trust in yourself and the belief that things will work out.
If I’m being honest, I love control – or at least the illusion of control.
What’s so liberating, terrifying, and exhilarating about travel? Control isn’t possible, no matter how tightly you grasp the illusion. Language barriers, different customs, and trying to meet people can all become huge tasks to overcome without knowing how to navigate the unknown.
It’s been a lot of trial and error.
My First Experience Abroad
My first real experience abroad was pretty rough. I spent 6 months as an exchange student in Belgium when I was 18. I struggled to make friends and found myself feeling more alone than ever. It was difficult enough that I questioned if I was cut out to travel or live abroad again.
After that experience, I needed time to build myself up again. I worked at McDonald’s until my first semester of college started in the fall. Once the painful memories became more distant, I realized that I missed the friends I had made there. My closest friends were Costa Rican, Venezuelan, Guatemalan, and Indian. Learning about their cultures and becoming close with them inspired me to keep traveling and connecting with people.
My time in Belgium left me anxious about feeling lonely when abroad. So, when I studied abroad in France in 2017 and moved to China in 2019, I came armed with a game plan. I created a list of all the things that could go wrong and devised a contingency plan. By envisioning worst-case scenarios and having backup strategies in place, I found peace of mind.
Finding Community in China and Beyond
My experience in China turned out to be one of the best of my whole life. I made amazing friends, met Sam, and built a community that felt like home.
I’ve realized that even though I can’t be prepared for every circumstance, I can be as prepared as possible. Not everyone who travels is good at going with the flow, or even a social butterfly. Adaptability isn’t my strongest characteristic, but I am definitely more adaptable than I was before traveling.
I’m also better at making friends. It seems like making friends throughout the years while abroad has only gotten easier. I’ve learned more about where to meet people, how to meet people, and even what type of people I am looking for.
The Importance of Community
One thing that’s surprised us about living and traveling abroad has been how easy it has been to make friends. Whether you’re a digital nomad, expat, or long-term traveler, you’re likely to encounter like-minded individuals. People tend to be open-minded, curious, and hospitable which helps when fostering a social environment. Surprisingly, we’ve found it harder to make friends in our home countries than abroad.
Remember that everyone you meet on your travels has taken a leap of faith. It takes a certain level of courage and a thirst for cultural exploration to leave the familiar behind. Let’s be real though; some people just want a better life, including us. For us, travel is a necessity so we can be together — thank you visa regulations and government policies!
How to Get Connected
Making friends when moving somewhere where you don’t know anyone takes effort. That being said, I’ve found that there are so many resources that have helped me to meet tons of amazing people all over the world. Here are some strategies that have proven effective for me:
Facebook:
Before relocating to a new city, I always turn to Facebook . I always search for expat or digital nomad groups by searching “[City] + [Expats]” or “[City] + [Digital Nomads].” Once accepted into these groups, I scour for events, points of interest, or useful information. Whether it’s book clubs, language meetups, or hiking excursions, I actively engage and join relevant Facebook or WhatsApp groups.
Girl Gone International (GGI):
https://girlgoneinternational.com
For women seeking connection with fellow expats or travelers, GGI is an invaluable community. When I moved to China, where Google Maps is inaccessible, GGI provided indispensable tips and support. From locating English-speaking doctors to discovering the best craft beer spots, GGI members readily offer assistance, drawing from their own experiences as newcomers.
GGI Chengdu was a great resource for any questions that women had such as:
Which doctors speak English?
Where’s the best place for craft beer?
Is anyone up for going for coffee this weekend?
People are usually willing to go out of their way to help because they remember how they felt when they had just arrived.
A lot of cities have regular GGI meetups. In Buenos Aires, for example, GGI aims to have 2 meetups per month. Chengdu’s GGI group held less frequent meetups but they usually had great turnouts. I even went on a food tour and hiking trip with Chengdu GGI.
Meetup.com:
Meetup.com is a solid choice for people seeking to find other people with hobbies in common. So far, we’ve found Meetup to be fairly active in Bangkok, Thailand, and in Buenos Aires, Argentina.
As of May 2024, Buenos Aires has two regular weekly digital nomad meetups.
Wednesday nights at Selina: Drinks on the rooftop and a more intimate setting
Thursday nights: A regular digital nomad meetup with 100+ people (in peak season).
Some of the Meetup groups I’ve attended are:
- Digital Nomad Meetups
- Quiz Nights
- Making Connections Meetup
- Language Exchange
- Mundo Lingo
Mundo Lingo:
This was the most surprising of them all. Many language exchanges I’ve done in the past are laid back and small, but Mundo Lingo in Buenos Aires was packed!
When we arrived at the event, we went to the front where we could choose any flag of the world to indicate which languages we speak and are learning.
What’s cool about Mundo Lingo is that people want to practice many different languages, not just the language of the host country. As someone fairly fluent in French and intermediate in Chinese, I always welcome opportunities to practice my language skills with native speakers or other language learners.
Expat Bars:
Any bar or restaurant where expats or nomads frequent is a great bet for meeting people. I’d love to make more local friends, but my Spanish is weak at best. Being able to get to know people who share similar experiences is extremely important.
Usually, there’s an Irish pub in town or an American bar or restaurant. Those are some places that attract an expat crowd. Most of the time, people go to expat bars when they are feeling social and even if you don’t strike up a conversation with someone right away, becoming a regular somewhere is a great place to start. The other “regulars” might notice you, too. I think this tip is better suited for men since most people I’ve met at expat bars are other men, but that’s not always the case.
Bumble Friends:
While I haven’t personally explored this avenue, a fellow GGI attendee recommended Bumble Friends as a great way to meet other people. Similar to regular Bumble, you swipe right or left on people based on their personalities and interests. If you and that person hit it off, you can set up a time to meet in person.
This seems like a great idea for people who are seeking genuine connections, especially in a one-to-one setting. I feel like this way could feel a bit more pressurizing, but the good news is that a friend date is less awkward than a real date.
NomadList:
How do we find the digital nomad hotspots? Before digital nomading, Google was my best friend. I would google the top places for digital nomads. Many times, NomadList popped up with results.
NomadList is a website that connects fellow nomads. If you pay, you can connect with people who are in the same city at the same time. Although I haven’t subscribed to its paid features, the free version offers valuable insights into popular destinations, complete with cost-of-living estimates and community rankings. It’s been a great way to weigh out the pros and cons of different locations we are considering for our next adventure.
In Closing
Whatever you do, don’t let obstacles stand in your way. Prepare as much as you feel comfortable, but remain open to some spontaneity. If you’re particularly worried about finding friends where you go, opting for destinations with large expat or nomad communities like Chiang Mai or Buenos Aires, can help ease your transition. As blossoming nomads, we have prioritized nomad hotspots as we start. Maybe we’ll get more adventurous as time goes by…
If you’re a fellow digital nomad or expat, what are some ways you have found community?
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